Top 7 Things You Must Know Before Speaking to Your Next Difficult Customer

Some customers are just plain difficult. They are always complaining, they are picky, know-it-alls, egocentric, faultfinders, constant complainers, unreasonable, demanding…you know these customers. Here are 7 insights that will help you gain the upper hand with difficult customers and ultimately regain their goodwill.

1. Anger precludes rationality.
   
   Angry customers simply cannot rationalize. This is because they are so wrapped up in the emotion of anger that everything you say is filtered through their emotions. Anger is an emotion and emotions are experienced in the right side of the brain. Rationalizing, problem solving, listening, and negotiating are all left-brain activities and your angry customer is stuck in the right side of the brain, and therefore cannot be expected to rationalize with you.
   
   
2. Anger must be acknowledged.
   
   It’s not productive for you to ignore anger or tiptoe around it. There is something known as the communication chain. When people communicate, they expect the person or persons they are communicating with to respond or react…this response or reaction is a link in the communication chain. A failure to respond to communication leaves the communication chain unlinked…broken. For example, If I walk into my office and say... “Hello Sherry, how are you?” ...and she says absolutely nothing, she’s broken the communication chain. And that leaves me feeling awkward, perhaps embarrassed.
   
   If a customer expresses anger and we fail to respond to it, the communication chain is broken and the customer feels like they are not getting through, that you are not listening. So, the customer may speak louder to make his or her point. They might become even angrier and more difficult, as they are resorting to whatever it takes to feel heard and understood. You can keep your angry customers from getting angrier by acknowledging their anger and responding to it. You can respond to anger with a statement like, “Clearly you’re upset and I want you to know that getting to the bottom of this is just as important to me as it is to you.” This statement directly and professionally addresses anger – without- making the customer even angrier. Now that the anger has been acknowledged, you have completed the communication chain.
   
   
3. First, diffuse anger.
   
   Research has shown that an approach to problem solving that emphasizes anger diffusion first results in a lesser payout by the company. If you first work to diffuse anger and then move into problem solving, you will find that communication is much easier because your customer is able to really listen to you. Problem resolution is now possible because your customer is calm and in the position to rationalize.

   Beginning the problem solving process before addressing and diffusing anger makes your job much harder because your customer is emotional and not able to fully rationalize. If you do attempt to solve the problem or negotiate, you will almost always have to offer more to satisfy the customer than you would if you had successfully first diffused anger.
   
   

4. The issue is not the issue.
   
   In conflict situations, the issue at hand is not usually the “real” issue. The way the issue is handled becomes the real issue. What really matters to customers is not the $2 overcharge or the fact their order for cranberry red paint is actually holly berry red. What does matter is how the company responds and resolves the issue. That becomes the real issue
   
   
5. Ventilation is crucial.
   
   An Angry customer can be compared to an erupting volcano. When a volcano is erupting, there is nothing you can do about it. You can’t speed up the eruption, you can’t put a lid on it, and you cannot direct or redirect it…it must erupt. When a customer is angry, they must experience and express their anger…through venting. We should not interrupt them or tell them to “calm down.” This would be as futile as trying to tame a volcano. A volcano erupts and eventually subsides. Your angry customer will vent and eventually calm down.
   
   
6. An apology works.
   
   An apology makes the angry customer feel heard and understood. It diffuses and anger and allows you to begin to re-establish trust. Not only that, but pilot studies have found that the mere act of apologizing has reduced lawsuits, settlement, and defense costs. You need to apologize to customers regardless of fault. Certainly, the apology needs to be carefully worded. Here’s an example of a sincere, yet careful apology:
   “Please accept my sincere and unreserved apology for any inconvenience this may have caused you.”
   
   
7. You cannot win an argument with a customer.
   
   Certainly, you can prove your point and even have the last word. You may be right, but as far as changing your customer’s mind is concerned, you will probably be just as futile as if YOU were wrong. Your goal in complaint situations is to retain the customer, not to be right. If you win the argument, you may very well have lost the customer. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.

Top 7 Ways to Get An Angry Customer to Back Down

Here are seven field-tested and proven tips for getting angry customers to back down.

1. Apologize. An apology makes the angry customer feel heard and understood. It diffuses and anger and allows you to begin to re-establish trust. Not only that, but pilot studies have found that the mere act of apologizing has reduced lawsuits, settlement, and defense costs. You need to apologize to customers regardless of fault. Certainly, the apology needs to be carefully worded. Here’s an example of a sincere, yet careful apology:
   
   “Please accept my sincere and unreserved apology for any inconvenience this may have caused you.”
   
   
2. Kill Them Softly With Diplomacy. This simple phrase has never failed me:
   
   
   “Clearly, we’ve upset you and I want you to know that getting to the bottom of this is just as important to me as it is to you.”
   
   
   When you say this, anger begins to dissipate. You’ve addressed the anger directly and non defensively and you haven’t been pulled into the drama of the attack.
   
   
3. Go into Computer Mode. To use Computer Mode you take on the formalities of a computer. You speak generally, without emotion, and you don't take the bait your angry or difficult customer is throwing you. Your words, tone, and attitude are completely impersonal and neutral - (Think of the automated response system you speak to when you call your wireless phone company or bank.)
   
   
   This "computer mode" response deflects, diffuses, and disarms angry customers because you don't add fuel to the fire by giving your difficult customer what they want -an emotional reaction. When you don't take the bait, the difficult customer is forced to stop dead in their tracks. And that means you regain control (and confidence).
   
   
4. Give this question a shot: “Have I done something personally to upset you?... I’d like to be a part of the solution.” Of course, you know you haven’t done anything to upset the customer. You ask this question to force the angry customer to think about his behavior. Often, the mere asking of this question is enough to get the ballistic customer to begin to shift from the right brain to the left brain, where he can begin to listen and rationalize.
   
   
5. Show empathy. Empathy can be a powerful tool used to disarm an angry customer and show that you genuinely care about the inconvenience the customer has experienced. Expressing empathy is also good for YOU, as it helps you truly begin to see the problem from the customer’s perspective/and this perspective will help keep you from losing your cool when your customer gets hot. By letting customers know that you understand why they are upset, you build a bridge of rapport between you and them.
   
   
   Here are some phrases that express empathy:
   
   
   • “That must have been very frustrating for you.”
   
   • “I realize the wait you encountered was an inconvenience.”
   
   • “If I were in your shoes, I’m sure I’d feel just as you do.”
   
   • “It must have been very frustrating for you have waited five days for your order and for that I am sorry.”
   
   
6. Deploy the “When Question” technique. Let’s say a customer says to you: “You people at ABC Company care nothing about the customer. All that matters to you is the almighty dollar!” This customer is clearly upset and emotional. He is trying to bait you with these attacking words. If you respond back defensively or emotionally, the customer has won. Instead of responding the way the customer wants you to, deploy the “When Question Technique.”

   Simply say, “When did you start feeling that ABC didn’t about your concerns?”

   Because this response is NOT what the customer was expecting when he through out the bait, you throw him off guard. If he answers your question, you are now in control of the conversation. Not only that, you will be well on the path to creating a calm resolve with the customer.
   
   

7. And finally, here’s a tip that works like magic. …. Show appreciation for the difficult person’s feedback. After your difficult customer has ranted and raved, you can regain control of the conversation by interjecting---not interrupting, but interjecting to thank them for taking the time to give you feedback. You can say something like:
   
   *Thanks for being so honest.
   
   *Thanks for taking the time to let us know how you feel.
   
   *We appreciate customers who let us know when things aren’t right.
   
   *Thanks for caring so much.
   
   The reason this tip works so effectively is because the last thing your irate or unreasonable customer expects is for you to respond with kindness and gratitude. It’s a shock factor and many times you’ll find that your customer is stunned silent and this is exactly what you want. When the customer is stunned into silence, you get in the driver’s seat and steer the conversation in the direction you want it to go.

Myra Golden is an award-winning professional speaker and principal of Myra Golden Seminars, LLC, a customer service training firm serving clients in food and beverage, banking, healthcare, hospitality, and other industries. Her client list includes McDonald’s, Johnson & Johnson, Coca-Cola, Frito-Lay, Michelin Tires, Pirelli, and Procter & Gamble, among many others.

Top 7 Reasons a Customer Service Representative Should Be Stopped Cold

No matter how difficult the circumstance or the customer, we must never lose sight of our purpose. To help keep you in "check" I am providing my list of 7 unforgivable sins of customer service employees. Read on to see how you measure up.

1. Hanging up on a customer. We all know it happens and there are certainly many times you want to slam the phone down, but do think twice. Patience, diplomacy and professionalism can help you remain calm and above the customer's ill-bred attitude.
   
   
2. Arguing with a customer. You can never win an argument with a customer. Theoretically, you can prove your point but you may end up losing your customer so you really lose.
   
   
3. Saying, "This is all I can do." You are there to help. Give your customer options and look for every way you can help.
   
   
4. Telling a customer to calm down. Certainly, there are times when a calm disposition would make every one's life easier, but telling your customer to calm down is rarely effective. Like you, your customers don't like to be told what to do. Try this approach instead: "Clearly you're upset and I want you to know that getting to the bottom of this is just as important to me as it is to you."
   
   
5. Escalating voice. Avoid the temptation to yell just because your customer is yelling. You don't want to get caught up in their drama. Instead, remain centered and calm, relying on your ability to communicate with diplomacy and professionalism.
   
   
6. Telling a customer s/he is wrong. You will be smart to never tell a customer they are wrong or mistaken. Telling a person they are wrong arouses opposition and will make the customer want to battle with you. (Ever tell your spouse they are wrong?) In "How to Win Friends and Influence People" Dale Carnegie points out an indisputable fact, "it's difficult, under even the most benign conditions to change people's minds." So why make it harder by starting out on the wrong foot? If you know your customer is wrong, it's better to start off saying, "I thought the contract read otherwise, but let's take a look."
   
   
7. Failing to apologize to customers in the wake of problems. One of the easiest and quickest ways to diffuse anger, create rapport, and regain goodwill with unhappy customers is to apologize. Offering an apology to a customer who experiences a problem should be a natural response from customer service providers. Yet, recent research reveals the startling fact that 50% of customers who voice a complaint say they never received an apology.

   
   
   Not only does an apology give "soft benefits" such as creating calm, shaving minutes off of talk time, less stress on the employee, etc., it can also translate into significant and measurable savings in reduced lawsuits, settlement costs, and defense costs.

Myra Golden is an award-winning professional speaker and principal of Myra Golden Seminars, LLC, a customer service training firm serving clients in food and beverage, banking, healthcare, hospitality, and other industries. Her client list includes McDonald’s, Johnson & Johnson, Coca-Cola, Frito-Lay, Michelin Tires, Pirelli, and Procter & Gamble, among many others.

Top 7 Phrases to Use With Unhappy Customers

The next time you come in contact with an unhappy customer, try one of these phrases. They are highly effective in helping to restore customer confidence and facilitating diplomatic problem solving.

1. “The problem you experienced is no more acceptable to us than it was to you.”
   
   
2. “I understand your concern. What do you think would be fair?”
   
   
3. “Although you might not agree with my decision, I’d like to explain it so you can at least understand.”
   
   
4. “Thank you for bringing this to our attention. We appreciate customers who let us know when things aren’t right.”
   
   
5. “Thank you so much for your feedback. We appreciate you giving us an opportunity to correct the problem and to meet your expectations.”
   
   
6. “Have I done something personally to upset you? I’d like to be a part of the solution.”
   
   
7. “Mr. Warren, we want to get to the bottom of this just as much as you do.”

Myra Golden is an award-winning professional speaker and principal of Myra Golden Seminars, LLC, a customer service training firm serving clients in food and beverage, banking, healthcare, hospitality, and other industries. Her client list includes McDonald’s, Johnson & Johnson, Coca-Cola, Frito-Lay, Michelin Tires, Pirelli, and Procter & Gamble, among many others.

Top 7 Behaviors That Cause Problems With Angry Customers

Here are 7 common mistakes well-intentioned professionals make when it comes to dealing with unhappy customers. Learn exactly what not to do so that you're well positioned to completely regain the goodwill of unhappy customers after any service mishap.

1. Telling the customer he or she is wrong. You will be smart to NEVER tell a customer they are wrong or mistaken. Telling a person they are wrong arouses opposition and will make the customer want to battle with you. (Ever tell your spouse they are wrong?) “It is difficult, under even the most benign conditions to change people’s minds.” So why make it harder by starting out on the wrong foot? If you know your customer is wrong, it’s better to start off saying something like, “I thought the contract read otherwise, but let’s take look.”
   
   
2. Arguing with a customer. You must realize you cannot win an argument with a customer. Certainly, you can prove your point and even have the last word. You may be right, but as far as changing your customer’s mind is concerned, you will probably be just as futile as if you were wrong. Your goal in complaint situations is to retain the customer, not to be right. If you win the argument, you may very well have lost the customer. Think carefully about the response you want to give and ask yourself, “Is my reaction one that will relieve the problem, or will it just relieve frustration? Will my reaction drive my customer further away? What price will I pay if “I” win the argument?” The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
   
   
3. Telling a customer to calm down. Certainly, there are times when a calm disposition would make every one's life easier, but telling your customer to calm down is rarely effective. Like you, your customers don't like to be told what to do. Try this approach instead: "Clearly you're upset and I want you to know that getting to the bottom of this is just as important to me as it is to you."
   
   
4. Failing to apologize to customers in the wake of problems. One of the easiest and quickest ways to diffuse anger, create rapport, and regain goodwill with unhappy customers is to apologize. Offering an apology to a customer who experiences a problem should be a natural response from customer service providers. Yet, recent research reveals the startling fact that 50% of customers who voice a complaint say they never received an apology.
   
   Not only does an apology give "soft benefits" such as creating calm, shaving minutes off of talk time, less stress on the employee, etc., it can also translate into significant and measurable savings in reduced lawsuits, settlement costs, and defense costs.
   
   An apology does not have to be an admission of fault. It can be offered to express regret. For example, "I'm so sorry for any inconvenience this misunderstanding has caused you."
   
   
5. Escalating voice. Avoid the temptation to yell just because your customer is yelling. You don't want to get caught up in their drama. Instead, remain centered and calm, relying on your ability to communicate with diplomacy and professionalism.
   
   
6. Not allowing the customer to vent. An angry customer can be compared to an erupting volcano. When a volcano is erupting, there is nothing you can do. You can’t tame it, can’t speed it up, and you can’t control it. It must erupt. But erupting volcanoes eventually subside. Your angry customer – who is intensely emotional – is the same way. He must erupt (that is…express his anger through venting). You can’t tame the customer, you must simply let him vent. After briefly venting, most angry customers will begin to calm down. Let your customers vent.
   
   
7. Proclaiming to the customer: “This is all I can do.” You are there to help. Give your customer options and look for every way you can help.

Myra Golden is an award-winning professional speaker and principal of Myra Golden Seminars, LLC, a customer service training firm serving clients in food and beverage, banking, healthcare, hospitality, and other industries. Her client list includes McDonald’s, Johnson & Johnson, Coca-Cola, Frito-Lay, Michelin Tires, Pirelli, and Procter & Gamble, among many others.

Top 7 Simple Guidelines for Handling Email Customer Complaints

Many companies have seen a surge in customer feedback through the email stream and for many customers email is the preferred communication means. Here are 7 quick tips for staying at the top of the email correspondence game.

1. Check emails as frequently as you check the phones. You answer the phones every time they ring and emails should be treated the same way. It’s not acceptable to check customer emails one or two times daily or hourly. Email response must be a priority.
   
   
2. Send an initial reply immediately – certainly no later than 1 business day.
   The easiest and most economical means for an initial reply is to have an automatic reply setup through your complaint tracking system or other software package. Some software packages are sophisticated enough to read the customer’s email, pick up on key words and reply based on email content. Other, simpler, packages simply respond with content you input. When I worked in consumer affairs at Thrifty, our auto responder simply said:
   
   Thank you for contacting us. Your email has been forwarded to our Customer Care Department. We will contact you within 5 business days.
   
   
3. Reply via email.
   Customers contacting you by email are suggesting that email is their preferred method of communication. Unless absolutely necessary, avoid calling or sending a response via postal (snail) mail. (Obviously, refunds or token items would still be sent postal mail.)
   
   
4. Resolve problem within 3 – 5 business days.
   The sooner the better. Email customers do not have tolerance for a 10-day turnaround. Five days is actually stretching it. Strive for immediacy.
   
   
5. Activate the spell-check feature. Spelling counts. Always, always proof emails.
   
   
6. Capture and archive emails in your CRM system. It’s critically important to log all email communications (both to and from the company) in your customer relationship management (CRM) system with dates and times. This helps you when emails are escalated, information is misinterpreted or there is an accusation of no response from the company.
   
   
7. Post a FAQ section on your company’s Contact Us page. Identify the top 10 reasons customers email your company and post responses to these queries on your website. Doing this can reduce the number of emails coming into your department or can better prepare your staff to respond. For example, At Thrifty Rent-A-Car System hundreds of customers contact Customer Care each month requesting a copy of a past rental agreement. The Customer Care Department created a form on the website specifically for customers requesting a rental agreement. Amazon.com has forecasted dozens of FAQ customers are likely to encounter and listed them on their site.

Myra Golden is an award-winning professional speaker and principal of Myra Golden Seminars, LLC, a customer service training firm serving clients in food and beverage, banking, healthcare, hospitality, and other industries. Her client list includes McDonald’s, Johnson & Johnson, Coca-Cola, Frito-Lay, Michelin Tires, Pirelli, and Procter & Gamble, among many others.

Top 7 WOW Ways to WOW Customers!

This week is National Customer Service Week. As we celebrate the people who pay our bills, I want to give you a few low-cost and no-cost ideas to WOW Customers so that they come back again and again and tell everyone they know.

1. Thank customers who voice a complaint. This can be done via handwritten note, typed letter, or even an email: “Thank you for your feedback. We appreciate customers who let us know when things aren’t right.”
   
   
2. Respond to emails within 4 hours (WOW!)
   
   
3. Be Gumby. The Container Store has adopted Gumby as their unofficial mascot. Gumby symbolizes being flexible as you relate to internal and external customers.
   
   
4. Send out Valentines Day cards that say, “We love doing business with you.”
   
   
5. Have a live person answer the phone – with no wait time.
   
   
6. Myra Golden Seminars sends all meeting planners a box of Death by Chocolate cookies to thank them for their business.
   
   
7. Send out Thanksgiving cards that say “Thank you for your business.”

Myra Golden is an award-winning professional speaker and principal of Myra Golden Seminars, LLC, a customer service training firm serving clients in food and beverage, banking, healthcare, hospitality, and other industries. Her client list includes McDonald’s, Johnson & Johnson, Coca-Cola, Frito-Lay, Michelin Tires, Pirelli, and Procter & Gamble, among many others.

Top 7 Ways to Handle Difficult Customers - Verbal Aikido

In my live complaint resolution seminars, I demonstrate the martial art Aikido and offer it as a strategy for diffusing anger. I began teaching this unconventional approach to managing conflict after having my breath taken away as I watched Steven Segal effortlessly defeat his opponents without violence or aggression in half a dozen of his movies. Aikido is a nonviolent martial art that never meets force with force and can be applied to conflict situations with demanding, irate or unreasonable customers. (I’ve personally applied Aikido to situations with customers, employees and co-workers.) Using the principles of Aikido, you too can diffuse anger and demonstrate amazing control over all aspects of verbal attacks.

People using “verbal aikido” can respond to heated situations directly and assertively without being pulled into the drama of the battle and they can lay the foundation for win-win resolutions that maintain the customer’s loyalty – even with angry customers. Here are 6 Aikido principles that will help you more effectively respond to anger.

1. An Aikidoist strategically calms down the attack.
   This is done by both the use of relaxed body posture and open hands. Verbal attacks from irate customers also need the same calming strategy. In Aikido, the master will step aside rather than confront the attack. This takes the power and speed out of the attack and allows the master to stay centered and calm. When you respond to your customer with “Clearly, we’ve upset you and getting to the bottom of this is just as important to me as it is to you.” anger begins to dissipate. You’ve addressed the anger directly and non defensively and you haven’t been pulled into the drama of the attack.
   
   
2. Aikido never meets force with force.
   In fact, there are no direct attacks and very little striking or kicking. When dealing with angry customers it is natural to respond to an attack with an attack. If the customer yells, we escalate our voice. When the attack gets personal, we become defensive and less willing to work with the customer. While we may feel justified in launching our attack because we’ve been attacked, we must realize that a defensive (forceful) response only escalates the original problem. Let’s learn from the Aikido masters and not attack back defensively. Instead, we will respond carefully and strategically.
   
   
3. Aikido emphasizes quick, decisive movements that are designed to use the attacker's force against him.
   This is done through evasive movements, body shifting, and leverage. Taking this to a verbal level, you’d take a customer’s intensity and sense of urgency and use that to your advantage with a reply like: “No question, we’ve messed up. Getting to the bottom of this is just as important to me as it is to you.” Instead of letting the customer’s intimidation tactics negatively impact you, you turn that energy back at the customer by pacing his actions.
   
   
4. Aikidoists blend with their opponent’s energy.
   In Aikido, this looks as if you move toward your opponent and then change places with them. In a verbal attack, blending with your customer is finding common ground with the customer. You can blend with your angry customer by listening with a sincere intent to understand their pain, frustration and needs and then responding with empathy. The knowledge you gain from listening to your customer becomes your force and positions you to redirect the energy in a productive direction. Once you’ve blended with the customer, that is, once you truly understand the customer’s situation, the attack can be neutralized and redirected.
   
   
5. Aikido students learn to turn with their opponent’s force and let that force go past them.
   When we respond to angry customers in this way, we’re able to keep our cool when customers get hot. We don’t get caught up in the emotion of anger. Instead, we allow the customer to express his feelings and we don’t take comments personally and we don’t allow our feelings (anger, rejection, offense) to control our responses.
   
   
6. An Aikido Master never seeks to kill his opposition.
   When we transfer this principle to customer service situations, we realize that our goal is to never hang up on a customer, blow a customer off, or “fire” a difficult customer. Our goal is to find more diplomatic ways to communicate and reach win win resolutions.
   
   
7. In Aikido, all opponents are considered partners.
   >Think of your angry customer as your partner and let this mindset direct you to use interactive dialogue to work with your customer to solve the problem. Try to not resist or coerce your “partner.” Work with your partner, talk with your partner, and seek solutions that benefit the customer and the company.

This article is an excerpt from The Golden Method for Complaint Resolutione-Learning course. The Golden Method from Myra Golden Seminars provides customer service professionals with the skills and strategies they need to deal with difficult customers
with ease and confidence, completely regain customer goodwill after service failures, and offer solutions that balance the interests of the customer and the company.

Top 7 Secrets for Moving Customers Out of a Hardball Mentality

Here are 7 proven tips for moving customers out of a hardball mentality into a constructive dialogue.

1. Confidently acknowledge and address anger.
   
   A big mistake among customer service professionals is to ignore a customer’s expression of anger or tip-toe around it. There is something known as the communication chain. When people communicate, they expect the person they are communicating with to respond or react…this response is a link in the communication chain. A failure to respond to communication leaves the communication chain unlinked…broken.
   
   For example, If I walk into my office and say... “Hello Sherry, how are you?” ....and she says absolutely nothing, she’s broken the communication chain. And that leaves me feeling awkward, perhaps embarrassed.
   
   If a customer expresses anger and we fail to respond to it, the communication chain is broken and the customer feels like they are not getting through. The customer might become even angrier and more difficult, as they are resorting to whatever it takes to feel heard and understood.
   
   You can keep your angry customers from getting angrier by confidently acknowledging their anger and responding to it. You can respond to anger with a statement like, “Clearly you’re upset and I want you to know that getting to the bottom of this is just as important to me as it is to you.” This statement directly and professionally addresses anger – without- making the customer even angrier. Now that the anger has been acknowledged, you have completed the communication chain.
   
   
2. Allow the customer to vent, but don’t lose control.
   
   An Angry customer can be compared to an erupting volcano. When a volcano is erupting, there is nothing you can do about it. You can’t speed up the eruption, you can’t put a lid on it, and you cannot direct or redirect it…it must erupt.
   
   When a customer is angry, they must experience and express their anger – and often this is done through venting. We should not interrupt an angry venting customer or tell them to “calm down.” This would be as futile as trying to tame a volcano. A volcano erupts and eventually subsides. Your angry customer will vent and eventually calm down.
   
   Always let angry customers vent. In most cases, your customer will only need to vent for fifteen to thirty-five seconds. Venting beyond 35 seconds can become ranting and cause you to lose control. After a few seconds of venting, you’ll want to jump back in and move the conversation forward constructively.
   
   
3. Don’t react emotionally.
   
   It can be easy to lose our cool when a customer gets hot, but be warned: In most cases, showing frustration, impatience, or acting even mildly upset doesn’t help you move the customer out of a hardball mentality. Usually, losing our own cool does nothing but make the customer even more upset or our attitude will make the customer even firmer in his original position.
   
   If you feel you’re beginning to lose your cool, don’t be afraid to hit the “pause” button. You hit the pause button by putting a customer on hold or telling the customer you will call them back.
   
   
4. Heed Steven Covey’s Words…Understand, then be understood.
   
   In The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, author Steven Covey tells a story of a patient going in for an eye exam. After briefly listening to the patient’s complaint, the doctor takes off his glasses and hands them to the patient and tells the patient to simply “take his glasses where them.”
   
   What are the chances you’d go back to a doctor that prescribes a solution without even diagnosing a problem? You don’t have much confidence in someone who doesn’t diagnose before they prescribe… But how often do we prescribe a solution before completely diagnosing the situation, in dealing with customers?
   
   Seek first to understand. Before you try PRESCRIBE a solution for a customer’s problem, before you quote policy or tell a customer what you cannot do, seek to truly understand the customer’s viewpoint. How has the problem impacted your customer? Has your customer lost money, time, respect, or confidence because of this problem? Does the customer feel embarrassed, wronged, discriminated against, or powerless? Try to really understand what your customer is experiencing and feeling. when you respond, communicate your full understanding of the problem from the customer’s perspective. Only then can you truly diagnose, BEFORE you prescribe a solution.
   
   Listening with the intent to understand gives you empathy for the customer and puts you in the position to solve the real issues. Once you really understand your customer, you naturally begin to communicate with empathy and to communicate more effectively. Your customer, who feels understood, can now begin to understand you.
   
   
5. Don’t belabor your point…no matter how right you are.
   
   be•la•bor - [bi-ley-ber] – verb: (1) to assail persistently, as with scorn or ridicule (2) work at (something) repeatedly or more than is necessary: He kept belaboring the point long after we had agreed.
   
   If you really want to tick a customer off or incite an already upset customer, belabor your point. Repeat your point (your policy; your position) over and over again. I mean really badger the customer with your elementary explanation so that the customer feels they aren’t too bright.
   Customer service professionals all around the world make the mistake of belaboring a point when speaking with customers. Don’t let this happen to you. Simply make your point once diplomatically and then enter into a constructive dialogue with your customer.
   
   
6. Get the customer saying ‘yes’, and if possible, keep them from saying ‘no’.
   
   When a person says “no,” all of their pride demands that they remain consistent with themselves. And it is very difficult, once they’ve said ‘no’, for them to change their mind and become “agreeable” with you, because their sense of pride is now involved. And we invest so much in our pride.
   
   Here’s how it works. Build an affirmative path by asking your customer two simple and obvious closed-ended questions that you know will result in a YES response. Once you do that, the customer will be on an affirmative path (with you) and it is far easier for them to agree with your next question. It’s very much psychological…your customer won’t feel comfortable disagreeing with himself…and will feel compelled to say yes to your third question so that he agrees with himself!
   
   
7. Have a graceful exit.
   
   When all else fails, you need a way to gracefully get out of a conversation with a difficult or unreasonable customer. Here’s a simple way to gracefully exit: “We see this differently and I’m going to have to put thought into the perspective you have shared with me. I will visit with my supervisor about your concerns and call you back with a response.”

Myra Golden is one of the customer service industry's most highly regarded trainers and is nationally recognized for delivering paradigm-shifting customer service programs that position employees to deal more effectively with difficult customers and completely restore customer confidence after dis-satisfying experiences. Her clients include McDonald’s, Johnson & Johnson, Coca-Cola, Frito-Lay, Michelin Tires, Pirelli, Scotts Miracle Gro, and Procter & Gamble, among many others.

Imagine your next phone call is from an angry, irate customer, and you've only got a few seconds to gain control. Are you 100% confident you can handle it?

If not, Myra Golden has the perfect program for you...a free online training designed specifically for hard working customer service professionals.

Top 7 Questions About Negotiating with Customers

Here are 7 Questions (and answers) About Negotiating with Customers with Myra Golden.

1. Is it wise to make concessions when negotiating with customers?
   
   Every negotiator, even savvy executives, concedes from time to time and as long as the concession makes good business sense, it’s okay. BUT – and this is a BIG but – you need to be aware of what your concessions are saying to customers. A large concession on your part tells the customer he can get a lot more, so he may press you for more. Rapid concessions undermined your company’s creditability. Only make concessions if you have considered all of the alternatives, you feel it will maintain the customer’s loyalty, and when it balances the interests of both your customer and your company.
   
   
2. How do you respond in a negotiation with a customer when the customer’s demand is unreasonable?
   
   I use 5 little magic words: “That sounds a little high.” And then you pause. No matter what dollar amount the customer puts out, just state the 5 magic words and then sit back and wait for their response. Most people become increasingly uncomfortable with silence and will feel compelled to respond. Most likely, your customer will either make a more reasonable request, or they will try to justify their request.
   
   
3. What do you do when you find yourself in a deadlock with the customer in negotiation situation? That is, what do you do when the customer isn’t accepting your offer and you are not willing to concede?
   
   Don’t allow the customer to push you into a corner. Here’s a phrase that will help you set and enforce your limits, while at the same time moving the conversation forward: “We see this differently, and I am going to have to put more thought into the perspective you have shared with me. It’s helpful to me to understand how you see things. In the meantime, here is what I can do to solve the immediate problem.”
   
   
4. Is it appropriate to negotiate with a difficult customer who is actually responsible for the problem they are complaining about?
   
   I am not for compensating customers when the problem is clearly their fault. Never forget, today’s exception becomes tomorrow’s expectation. Customers have eternal memory, and they’ll expect you to give in again if they encounter the same “human” error. Here’s how I’d respond to the customer when the problem is clearly their fault:

   
   
   “We appreciate hearing about your experience, but we cannot compensate you in this matter because you failed to follow instructions (or misused the product, etc.)”
   
   

5. Should frontline customer service employees be involved in negotiations with customers or should this always be the responsibility of supervisory or management employees?
   
   As long as employees are trained, empowered, confident, and known to make good judgment, they can negotiate with customers. Having said that, it’s often a good move for frontline customer service representatives to admit early on that they don’t have the final say in a negotiation. (Even when they do have the final word, this is a good move.)Admitting this gives the representative a graceful exit, should negotiations become deadlocked.
   
   
6. What are some of the most common tactics customers use to paint companies into a corner in a negotiation situation?
   
   There are many tricky tactics customers will use when negotiating. When it comes to negotiating a settlement in a product liability complaint, a common tactic is the use of hypothetical questions. An example hypothetical question is “If my 3 year old son had bitten into the hamburger that had the piece of glass in it, don’t you agree that he could have been in serious condition?” This is clearly a setup and you cannot answer the question. Get the customer focused on solving the actual problem that did occur and nothing more.
   
   
7. Is it appropriate to negotiate with customers via email?
   
   Yes, it is. Ten years ago I would have answered differently, but today email is the preferred communication medium of many of your customers. You need to know that email negotiations tend to take longer than phone and face to face negotiations and email negotiations are less likely to end in agreement. If things become tricky via email, pick up the phone and call your customer.

Myra Golden is author of the best-seller, Beyond WOW. She is nationally recognized for delivering paradigm-shifting programs that position employees to build, restore, and strengthen customer relationships. Her clients include McDonald's, Coca-Cola, Frito-Lay, Michelin Tires, Estee-Lauder, and many more.

Top 7 Ways to Nail the Customer Who Tries to Push You Into a Corner

Here are 7 little tips and tricks to help you get any angry customer to back down.

1. Hang up on yourself. This is actually a fun little trick. When your customer is trying to manipulate you with anger or some other tactic, you can bring the conversation to an immediate, yet subtle, halt by hanging up on yourself. Do it this way, “So, I hear you saying you want $500 for pain and suffer-----CLICK! The customer will think the line went dead and you’ll be off the hook, at least for a couple of minutes. Use your brief interlude to regroup and to prepare a comeback strategy.
   
   
2. Make the customer justify his demand. A lot of the time, the demands customers make are just silly and they put the demands out there just to see what they can get. Handle this by calling the customer on this “ploy”. Here’s how this might look: “How did you arrive at that figure?” And sit back and listen to your customer’s explanation. A few customers will have a justifiable reason for their request. But most will squirm at your request for justification.
   
   
3. Put your foot down. I’m a big proponent of drawing the line on consumer error. Why should companies compensate customers when the problem was clearly the fault of the customer??? Here’s a great way to put your foot down: “We appreciate hearing about your experience, but we cannot compensate you in this matter because you failed to follow instructions/did not read instructions/misused the product.”
   
   
4. Say, “That sounds a little high.” When your customer makes a ridiculous demand, don’t laugh in his face. Simply say, “That sounds a little high.” And then pause like a locked up computer. Your customer will become unconformable with your silence and I guarantee they will do one of two things: (a) make a more reasonable request, or (b) attempt to justify their request. Whichever way they go, you are in control.
   
   
5. Use the “broken record” technique. If your customer is ranting, raving, or rambling and you feel you have lost control of the conversation, you can quickly regain control using the Broken Record technique. Simply repeat a sentence or phrase over and over again until your ranting customer hears you. It can be as simple as:

   
   o “Mr. Jones, what I can do is send you coupons for three bags of potatoes chips.”

   
   o Mr. Jones, what I can do is send you coupons for three bags of potatoes chips.”

   
   o Mr. Jones, what I can do is send you coupons for three bags of potatoes chips.”

   
   This example would be effective for the customer who is demanding more, but three coupons is your limit. The reason this technique works is that typically, repeating yourself, verbatim, in a non-confrontational tone, will force the upset customer to stop talking – if for no reason – than to get you to stop repeating yourself. It’s very much psychological.
   
   

6. Say nothing. When a customer tries to bait you with a raised voice, profanity, or anger, a great tactical response is to just say nothing. Don’t let the customer even hear you sigh. Your dead silence will eventually make the customer feel uncomfortable and he or she will either stop talking or shape up. You’ve got to try the “say nothing” technique the next time you’re dealing with an angry customer. It works like magic.
   
   
7. Give your “final answer” and be done with it. When you know the customer is trying to push you into a corner, don’t waste time. Just get to the point and end the conversation like this: "We've given this a great deal of thought, and it's the best we can do. Any more and this simply won’t make good business sense."

Top 7 Ways to Completely Restore Customer Confidence After Things Go Wrong

Every day things go wrong in the service world and we are faced with the challenge of turning service failures into service recoveries. But what does it really take to restore customer confidence and regain goodwill? I began to explore that question more than 10 years ago and since that time I have studied service failure and service recovery from every possible angle and I have benchmarked best-in-service companies throughout the world. My research has led to me uncovering a series of 7 simple, but remarkably effective strategies that will unequivocally position any organization to keep customers coming back after even the worst has happened. Each of the 7 strategies is scientifically proven and surprisingly easy to execute.

I present to you How to Completely Restore Customer Confidence After Things Go Wrong: The 7 Things You Must Do...

1. Courtesy.
   
   Certainly, anyone in the position of interacting with customers must be friendly, helpful, polite, courteous, and flexible. These attitudes and behaviors are not just nice, but they are indeed expected. But when it comes to complaint handling specifically, we know that employee politeness while addressing the issue helps diffuse the problem in the customer’s mind (Liao, 2007).
   
   Research by Hui Liao found that when customers feel like they are being treated with respect, dignity, and sensitivity by employees, they feel a sense of justice and fairness from the company (Liao, 2007).
   
   As simple as it may sound, politeness is a tangible asset that can positively impact customer satisfaction with service recovery. If you solve the customer’s issue, but are rude or indifferent in the process, you can still negatively impact the relationship. Simply put, when your employees are polite and courteous, customers will experience more satisfaction and reward you with stronger loyalty.
   
   
2. Apology.
   
   Making an apology to customers after things go wrong is positively related to satisfaction with the recovery (Liao, 2007). When a service employee apologizes to a customer, she conveys politeness, courtesy, concern, effort, and empathy and this goes a long way (Smith, Bolton, & Wagner, 1999). Consider the following research:
   
   *Gallup research has shown that a genuine apology can actually strengthen a customer’s emotional bond to a company, leaving him or her more emotionally connected than customers who never experienced a problem (Fleming & Asplund, 2007).
   
   *Research by TARP has shown that when an apology is perceived as genuine, customer satisfaction increases 10 – 15%.
   
   *A revolutionary program appropriately called Sorry Works! encourages doctors and hospitals to apologize quickly when mishaps occur and to offer a fair settlement upfront to families and their attorneys. One of the first hospitals to implement Sorry Works was The University of Michigan Hospital. The results have been astonishing. The University of Michigan Hospital has cut lawsuits in half, reduced litigation expenses by two-thirds (or $2 million annually), and reduced their insurance reserves from $72 million in 2001 to less than $20 million in 2007.(Wojcieszak, 2008).
   
   Offer your customers a heartfelt apology after a service failure and you will not only restore customer confidence and regain goodwill, but you should also realize the benefits of reduced litigation expenses and claims costs.
   
   
3. Justification.
   
   A vital, but often overlooked element of customer recovery is to provide an explanation for how or why the problem happened. Taking the time to explain to a customer what might have caused the problem helps organizations re-establish trust.
   
   In an article titled, Manage Complaints to Enhance Loyalty, John Goodman says, “In many case, a clear, believable explanation as to why the policy or performance is reasonable will at least mollify the customer and, in some case, satisfy him or her.” (Goodman, 2006). Hui Liao had this to say about the importance of providing an explanation, “Explaining to customers what might have caused the service failure may (also) enhance customer satisfaction. Similarly, in the service recovery context, open communication may alleviate customers’ bad feelings about the service failure.”
   
   Providing an explanation can be as simple as saying, “Thanks for taking the time to let us know about _____. We appreciate customers who let us know when things aren’t right. Here’s what we think may have happened...”
   
   
4. Resolution.
   
   One of the gifts of a voiced complaint is that if offers the company an opportunity to re-perform the service. When given this second chance, companies must bend over backwards to fix the problem and restore customer confidence. When a company fails to resolve the issue, the customer is left hanging, she begins to lose trust in the organization, and feels like voicing the complaint was a waste of time.
   
   TARP, Inc. studies have discovered that a customer who goes to the effort to complain, but remains dissatisfied is usually 50% less loyal than someone who did not bother to complain (Goodman, 2006). As a result, a poor problem resolution process will produce a “double deviation” effect and will result in perceived injustice, hence intensifying customer dissatisfaction (Bitner, et al 1990).
   
   Resolving the customer’s problem will have a positive impact on customer satisfaction and customer loyalty. Failing to fix a problem after a customer has gone through the trouble of voicing a complaint is treacherous because customers have been let down twice and they may not be as willing to forgive you.
   
   
5. Immediateness.
   
   Not only is resolving the customer’s problem obviously important (point # 4), but a speedy recovery response will enhance customers’ evaluations of your company (Smith, Bolton, & Wagner, 1999). Your goal with problem resolution needs to be “One and done”. What I mean is, your employees need to be equipped with the trust (from you), empowerment, and training to be able to resolve complaints on the first phone call or first visit.
   
   Not only does a speedy recovery improve the customer’s perception of the company, but it actually has a greater impact on loyalty than the resolution itself. TARP, Inc. found that ninety-five percent of complaining customers would remain loyal if their complaint was resolved on the first contact. That number dropped to seventy percent when the complaint was not immediately resolved.
   
   The longer it takes for the service provider to provide a full recovery, the greater the customer’s perception is that they have been treated unfairly (Smith, Bolton, & Wagner, 1999). Improve your organization’s ability to handle problems quickly and well and you’ll undoubtedly realize increases in customer satisfaction and loyalty.
   
   
6. Compensation.
   
   Reparation (in the form of discounts, free merchandise, refunds, gift cards, coupons, and product samples) after a service failure has been found to restore equity and improve customer satisfaction (Smith, Bolton, & Wagner, 1999).
   
   A Society of Consumer Affairs Professionals customer loyalty study found that 58% of complaining consumers who received something in the mail following their contact with consumer affairs departments were delighted, versus only 40% of those who did not receive anything.
   
   Don’t hesitate when it comes to compensating customers after a service failure. Your reward will be increased customer satisfaction, loyalty, and powerfully persuasive positive word-of-mouth advertising.
   
   
7. Surprise & Delight.
   
   This bonus element is all about going beyond problem resolution and inspiring a feeling of astonishment through unexpectedness.
   
   One of my clients in the beauty industry is maximizing surprise & delight by creatively using gift cards in a way that is generating profits. They used to compensate customers dollar-for-dollar; a $3 overcharge was resolved with a $3 check. Makes sense doesn’t it? Well, now they give a $10 gift card for a $3 overcharge. The customer is WOW’d. But not only is the customer WOW’d and telling her girlfriends about the unexpected gift card, but the company is enjoying a redemption rate of 67% with customers spending 2x the gift card amount in the store.
   
   Try a little surprise & delight and you’ll get your customers talking and, if you design it right, you’ll also enjoy growth as a direct result of the WOW factor.